just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
i permit you to call me
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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