Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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