god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize