where does the pee come out of this thing
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
