so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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