Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
