I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize
