This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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