Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
