i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Randomize
