you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize
