Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
