yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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