why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
You know, be my cock's hype man.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
