Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Drunk is not a location!
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Randomize