school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize