My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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