So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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