it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I party with great urgency now.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
