Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
