he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
