I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
