I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
