Fuck appropriateness.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize