lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
pop tarts are not kleenex
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I think people are normalizing furries
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
