Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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