Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
