dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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