Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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