The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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