My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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