I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
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