Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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