Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
