It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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