you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
You're a waste of cheezeits
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
