I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
