i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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