she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize