Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I am one with the molecules
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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