the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
