Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
