And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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