Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
