I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
