He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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