happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
