3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
