You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
found the other keg... it's in the tree
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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