And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
