We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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