Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
