Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
